8.04.2005

And the Envelope please...

Comes a dear Snarkling wondering about how to send all those pages Miss Snark keeps insisting on.

And the answer is: neatness counts.
Miss Snark likes things that can be arranged tidily.
She does not like bundles of envelopes so fat with pages that she could use it to play stickball with the lads on Second Ave.

Herewith the recipe for presentation:

First, a 10 x 13 catalog envelope.
This is the envelope you mail everything in.

Inside it goes, in this order:
cover letter
five pages of writing sample
#10 Stamped self addressed envelope with ONE first class stamp.
These items are paper clipped together if attached at all.
NO staples, tape, brackets, chewing gum or magic spells.

You put all this in FLAT.

This way, it comes to Miss Snark's tidy desk and she can open it without cutting the paper in half (it's happened), without trying to stuff a polite letter into an envelope that was folded over so many times it has more wrinkles than a soap opera plot line, and most important, it can behave itself in the stack of incoming mail.

Is this going to get you a better, closer read?
No.

Is this going to keep Miss Snark from saying no if it sux?
No

Is Miss Snark going to measure your envelope and discard those that don't meet her specificiations?
No.

So..why bother?
Cause you're a professional.
And you take pride in your work.
And you like things to look like you care.
The diligence you bring to your everyday tasks (not that communicating with Miss Snark should ever be considered mundane) carries over to your writing.
Do it well.
It's good Snarkarma.

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

ah, such simple, concise, and worthwhile advice. i love you miss snark.

Miss Snark said...

Miss Snark basks in the love of her snarklings.
Now she is going to go bite the ass of a certain sales department that thinks "back order" is an acceptable level of stock.

Anonymous said...

you can practice on mine if you want. it tastes like a gin martini - i swear.

Anonymous said...

Just curious, but wouldn't it be so much easier for you, and the writers to accept e-queries? I'd think it would save time. You could simply read, reply, delete. Instead of dealing with paper, and typing up a reject letter and sending it off.

Anonymous said...

Having dealt with e-queries, and the accompanying reality that sending polite, timely "not for us" passes often results in getting back daily harangues along the lines of "no really, it IS right for you, look again," I can understand how one would decide to not even go there.

Anonymous said...

Hmmm, interesting anonymous. I also deal with e-queries, and out of thousands, have only had one very polite response to a rejection. So, what you are suggesting is hardly typical.

rosemerry said...

e-queries are really annoying to me as a writer. So unless an agent/magazine says they only take e-queries then I send it snail mail.

Snail Mail shows you care about your work and has a professional look. Anyway I'm poor I can't afford to print out all the rejections through e-mail to add to my Book of Rejection.