A snarkling offers:
we Snarksters will help post bond in lira if you should happen to be apprehended stalking in Italy.
Miss Snark is touched by your offer. Like all offers though, Miss Snark has a few negotiating points:
First, euros! European currency is now euros which is a good thing in Italy cause the suitcase of lira was getting old.
Second, Miss Snark is not stalking Mr. Clooney. She's making herself available to him. True, she's available at his driveway daily, but that's not stalking, that's..um...planning!! yes! Miss Snark is just being very very organized.
Third, Mr. Clooney is actually IN New York right now. The fact that Miss Snark is trapped like a rat in her office of towering manuscripts is clearly a cruel karmic joke.
However, feel free to send the cash anytime. Miss Snark can always use the currency to tip Guido the gin delivery man.