1. "This novel is the first to explore the highly charged theme of gay marriage now that it is safe to do so since the movie Brokeback Mountain".
Brokeback Mountain was a novella. Published even. That's why McMurtry's Oscar that says "Screenplay adapted from another medium" isn't talking about a clairvoyant. Secondly, you'd have to be under not just one rock but several to think publishers haven't been dealing with gay topics. You didn't know Heather Has Two Mommies? How about the entire publishing company called Alyson Books?
2. "Every male in Chicago will respond to this book". Even the ones that are under age six and can't read? You think 16 year old boys respond to book that babies do? oh honey...you don't have teens do you?
3. "There is a vast conspiracy between the Catholic church and the US Government". The US Government can't conspire among its own branches let alone adding the Pope and his good fellas to the bunch. Gimme a break.
What joins all three of these nitwittery statements is that they are grandiose assumptions that have no place in a query letter UNLESS they are followed by: and here's three facts to support it. Just telling me something doesn't mean I'm going to believe it. no no, I learned my lesson the hard way when that book that was sure to "be a New York Times bestseller" was missing not just an ending but a plot.
Lesson for the day: Don't worry about querying me for something off my list. As you can see, that's not even in the nitwit ballpark compared to these things.
And if anyone isn't sure why 1-3 are nitwittish, let me know. I'll be glad to stand on my soapbox and yap. and yap. and yappppp.