"Some Opinions on Portio's New Play"

Robin, who was, after all, the Prince of Fairyland and knew more than a bit
about will-of-the-wisps (having impersonated one more than once) and the
different forms they take, was in a bit of a muddle. He was ready to go the
pub, but had taken a moment to stand on the stage after giving his cast the
script for the new play to imagine the roar of the greasepaint and the smell
of the crowd -one of those things that always amused him. Then a sudden breeze,
a distraction, and-

Roderick Maxwell, who unfortunately hadn't gone home yet, came back onstage in
a high dudgeon. " "Your mother wears Army boots!‚ Your Mother wears Army
boots? This is a bloody stupid line!"

And Sam the prop-mistress swept on with high melodrama. "Terence the Terrapin
has gone missing!"

Hazel laughed. "Drop everything and give me ten"

"books," Robin said, finishing the line. Perhaps surrealist comedy wasn't
what he should have chosen, but he had thought in a fit of sudden exhiliration
that it would be fun to try a new author; and, not entirely coincidentally, he
owed said new author a favour, for not playing up that business with his
brother Trin and 'The Lord of the Rings'. And 'Promenading Poodles' was the

Behind him Will said conversationally to Raphael, "I think I have a bunion."

"Really?"said Raphael. "Shall we go to the pub and talk about it?"

"Perhaps once the drama is over."

"That is something to keep in mind."

"Look,"Robin said soothingly to Roderick, glaring at his two friends, "I
didn't say you had to look up the Bat Segundo show on the Internet˜ I mean, you
don't have to agree with the fundamental concerns of the play, but"

"You're in league with that - that - galleycat Portio!"

There was a pause. Will (who didn't think much of Portio, either, but cared
less for Roderick) snickered.

"Surely you mean "alley-cat‚?" Hazel said brightly. "I mean, I understand you
don't like the play, but get your terms"

"'Promenading Poodles' is a stupid name, and it's a stupid play! We just
finished 'Hamlet', and now you want to go on to this-this -this sorry excuse
for a comedy˜ Why can't we do 'A Midsummer Night's Dream' or something?"

"Because you wouldn't be a very good Bottom,"Will said caustically.

Roderick swung round and gaped in rage at him. "You b-b-b˜"

Raphael grinned at him seraphically. Robin ran his hands through his hair in

" In the midst of the word he was trying to say,
In the midst of his laughter and glee,
He had softly and suddenly vanished away -- -
For the Snark was a Boojum, you see."

Robin flung his hands in the air. "Lord, what fools these mortals be!"

Will snickered again.

He's not the only one laughing!
Scoring to come!


JLB said...

Surreal indeed!

Self-appointed scorekeeper said...

A perfect score on the technicals...but is it really funny?

McKoala said...

This is the most fun way
To spend my working day
Alas your bold endeavour
Can't go on forever
I see one tiny crack
In your stunning wit attack
Time and sleep connive
To take away twenty five!

Go to bed Miss Snark!

jerry said...

I wish I'd said "the snark is a boojum."

- fellow Zelazny fan

Anonymous said...

"Seraphically" -wow.

Kate said...

You're amazing!!!