4.02.2006

50!

The Easter Parade was due to start in fifteen minutes. I had planned to walk with the Bat Segundo formation, known for their breathtaking yearly rendition of terrapin mating for the grandstand crowd. But my bunion was killing me, the pain far more intense than any pleasure to be derived from the smell of the greasepaint and the roar of the crowd, usually my
lifeblood.

My thoughts were further muddled by the promenading poodles suddenly milling to my left. A quick whistle from their wrangler and they were just as quickly out of sight, and I was left to wonder if they had just been some will of the wisp of my imagination.

I found a perch on the windowsill of a shop on Main Street and surreptitiously slipped off my beige espadrille, gaining a brief respite from the throbbing pain.

"Nice toes. Glad to see you've overcome your trauma." My best friend, Josh, settled down next to me, trying to appear all hipster in his gently frayed khaki blazer framing a navy blue t-shirt emblazoned with the emblem of the latest it band, galleycat.

"What trauma?" I asked, easing my foot back into its shoe.

"From all the kids telling you your mother wears army boots back in the day."

"Your snark is losing its touch." I replied.

"I've begun to think that myself."

We heard the first, faint stirrings of the band leading the parade. The starting point was two blocks down from where we stood and it would take a good five minutes for it to get to us. I noticed a storefront across the boulevard with a yellow banner draped across the window, with Opening Soon in big black letters.

"Where'd that come from?"

"Huh?" Josh replied. I pointed over to the sign and he said, "Oh that. It's the new gym slash book exchange that's opening." Josh shrugged, as if a gym slash book exchange store for lack of a better word was the new ubiquitous coffee joint.

"Gym slash book exchange. What the hell is that?" I asked. Down the street, the first band was coming into view.

"It's a new concept. For bookworm gymrats." Josh said.

"Really." I replied. "And what's this new concept called?"

"That," Josh said, "is the really cool part. It's called Drop and give me ... ten books." A sly smile crept over his face and I resisted the urge to shove him into the middle of the Over-Fifty All-Male Tuba Revue, oompah-ing their way through Easter Bonnet.


Miss Snark is speechless at the idea of something like this happening in a place other than New York ...becuase there is no Main Street in New York.

Scoring to come

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Pssst! What happened to #49?

JLB said...

Gym slash book exchange must be part of that "fusion" trend, right?

Phyllis S said...

I screwed up 'roar of the greasepaint'. I'll quietly go open a vein now at my impending loss.