Call Hizzoner and complain!


Dost Thou tosseth all Thy dastardly, offensively massive, unsolicited works into a mere workaday circular file, or into a recycle bin? Prithee, answer carefully and with much ponderous thought, for verily I say unto Thee: Thine answer shalt determine mine continued suff'rance of Thine in-your-faceness.

Ever Thine humble,
Imnotta Totalfool

Well...let's start with the fact that there's no curbside paper recycling in New York City. Glass and bottles yes. Plastics yes. Not paper.

However, you ask if I toss all "unsolicited works". There's a difference here between manuscripts and query letters. I read all query letters. By virtue of putting my name on various lists of agents, having a member page at Publishers Marketplace and a listing in Writers Market, I've said "query me". There are guidelines about what I'm looking for and how to send stuff so it gets considered but basically I'm soliciting query letters.

I'm not soliciting manuscripts and I don't read "unsolicited manuscripts". I read the ones I ask for. I ask for ones based on query letters.

I guess it would be incorrect to say I hope you continue to suffer with my face...but thy construction is thine own.


litagent said...

I used to let my children use rejected mss. as coloring paper -- until the day my daughter presented a masterpiece to Grandma, and Grandma read the other side, where the language happened to be as "colorful" as my daughter's drawing. Lesson learned. Everything gets recycled.

Anonymous said...

Oddly enough, the 'thy' construction (as seen here) is actually informal.

If you're speaking to royalty, it's a far better idea to use 'you'.