Greetings, your snarkfuliciousness,
I finished my first novel a year ago and have been doing research and rewrites ever since. I have everything I need except a compelling query (been scrapped and rewritten two dozen times). Given my genre novel's youthful, gritty (dare I say, edgy) tone and voice, I'm stuck on a word.
In the synopsis bit of the query, clusterfuck works so well, as it accurately portrays the amount of danger the protag is in, and is an obvious clue to my sopranos-grand-theft-auto-esque dependence on vulgarity. I feel there's no reason to hide in the query the language I use all throughout the novel's dialogue. And while I only want to use that one word, I understand this is a business letter.
Can of worms, hornet's nest, powder keg, big lot of trouble, ect.. doesn't have the impact I'm looking for.
Is it the height of insanity to cuss in your query, or will it merely separate me from agents who wouldn't want to represent my potty-mouth work anyway?
I appreciate what you do for us obsessive, clueless writers, and I don't mind being a nitwit, because I can depend on others to straighten my ass out.
As you can see from the two preceding posts, you're not even in the running for Nitwit of the Day. Maybe tomorrow.
At some point some one has to read the novel so if clusterfuck is the word of the day, might as well use it up front. And if an agent is horrified/offended and chagrined, well, you've saved them from reading this horrifying/offensive, dare I say it edgy, novel. Besides I'll take a novel that uses cluster fuck any day of the week before I'll look at sensitive coming of age novel or someone doghelpus battling their personal demons.
If you've been working on your query letter for a year, you need to get off your ass and get this thing out in the world. You wait too long and clusterfuck is going to be the name of some celebrity's offspring and you'll be as edgy as Grandmother Snark's purple mohawk.
(My spell czech wants to change clusterfuck to cloister; I'm not sure what that says about Firefox.)