Have you all taken leave of your senses?

Dear Miss Snark,

Although I may be wet behind the ears, I know that publishing is a dog eat dog kind of place. I have read that agents and editors will reject your manuscript if they see cliches and I want to be prepared to swim with the sharks. I may not be sharp as a tack, but I didn't just fall off the turnip truck either. I know writing isn't a piece of cake and I know you can't please all the people all of the time, but how far should I go to please an agent or editor?

Should I bend over backwards to remove all the cliches from my work? Because that might take a lot of time and time is money. Will an agent or editor get bent out of shape or blow a gasket if I leave a few in?

I have been thinking about this for a long time and am climbing the walls. I have a cliche in my opening paragraph and I'll be fit to be tied if I have to take it out. Please don't flip your lid or read me the riot act about asking these questions because I'm already getting worked into a lather.

I read your blog and it's a laugh a minute and although you may not see eye to eye with everyone, I'd be pleased as punch and happy as a clam to have you answer my questions.

See you later alligator!

Dear dog in heaven.
Miss Snark is rendered speechless.
She's not sure whether to laugh or cry,
or just snark till she's blue in the face.

Time will tell if the approach is just not quite right for us at this time; meanwhile she wishes you all the best and oh, and rest assured she gave personal attention to your email despite this form letter response.


Debby G said...

Hahaha! That was funny!

Anonymous said...

oh dog, what in the world! I can tell you from working at a newspaper -cliches bite the big one! Seriously, we need to new one liners fast, because . . .because. . .I can't think of a reason. *sigh*
I have one person who actually keeps reusing her little cliches every other week, I can type them in my sleep. I mouth them as I type, and my eyes glaze over each and every time I see them. I can't imagine what editors have to go through...or Her Snarkiness.

Jaime Smith said...

My eyes are bleeding.

Anonymous said...

That was funny as a heart attack!

Termagant 2 said...

Call it a comment on trying to read Miss S before I've finished my first cup of coffee--I was halfway through the post before I realized it was JUST KIDDING!

T2, slithering off now to write something

M. G. Tarquini said...

So...Miss Snark? Is that a yes or a no?

Janny said...

You're probably happy as a clam to start your day with a ray of sunshine like this!

What a HOOT!


Anonymous said...

That writer should have his photo next to the word, 'cliche' in the Dictionary.