Reject me? ME? I think NOT!

well, if a picture is worth a thousand words
this dvd=10,000

(thanks to JM for the link)


Brenda Bradshaw said...

Piss midget!

What a riot! LOOOOOVE it.

theinadvertentauthor said...

Piss-midget!!! Hah!!!

M. G. Tarquini said...

Oh. Lordy, Lordy, Lordy.


Flugle horn.

Dear dear.


McKoala said...

'the book I have spent the whole weekend writing' - love it! Love Black Books altogether.

Eileen said...

My God- how did they see into my mind?

This is too too funny! said...

Ha hahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahaha (wiping tears from my eyes) heeheeheeheeheehee!

Anonymous said...

Love it. Totally captured my 2- rejections-in-one-day today :-)

librisfb said...

So....Miss Snark....do I just send a link to this video to all those agents who have rejected me?

It would save me postage stamps and time, which is important since I think I need next weekend to write my second book.

DJT said...

How delightful! Haven’t had such a lovely laugh in ages. Thank you for posting the link.


Anonymous said...

I listened to that twice through,
smiling the whole time. Piss midget! I'm encouraged and entertained. I hope the poor man felt better after writing the letter and then had sense enough to rip it up. ha ha Thanks.

Kirsten said...

omg that's one of the nicest laughs I had in a long time!!!!

M.E Ellis said...

LOL @ piss midget and headbutt into a fine paste.

Shame that it affects some writers in this way. Have never understood it myself. Move on to the next, I say!


Anonymous said...

Chuck Mangione -murderer! -JTC

Jim Winter said...

There is a well-known agent who sent me the most unprofessional rejection I've ever read. (Since it happened to me, it's not funny. YMMV.)

I may call him a piss midget when we meet.

As long as I'm in the midst of a four-book deal.

And I already have an agent.

Who doesn't like like Barbara Bauer on his web site.

Or I may refer [Insert fanficcer tormenting Lee Goldberg here] to him. And say I'm Lee Goldberg when I do it.

I'll have to buy Lee a beer for that one.

12 said...

What? ... You mean this wasn't serious?

Bernita said...

Yanno (TM), I found that rather moving - the body language.

Marta said...

Thanks for the a.m. laugh. Love the show "Black Books," which airs every now and then on BBC America. Bernard Black sits around swilling red wine, smoking, and kicking customers out of his bookstore so they don't bother him while he reads.

The American version of a bookstore sitcom? "Stacked" with Pamela Anderson.

Termagant 2 said...

Most excellent. However, ya left off the Beverage Alert.

This reminds me of the e-mail I got from an agent I never heard of, thanking me for (and, of course, rejecting) an unnamed MS I hadn't sent her.

Of course, I replied.

Dear Agent Hamster-Brain:

Thank you for your kind communication. I deeply regret that I cannot accept rejections from unknown agents at this time. Accordingly, please find attached my written contract for your agenting services, with your commission reduced to 10% because you are obviously lacking in cerebral cortical matter.

I wish you the very best in finding the right client list.


I got back the same e-mail rejecting my work as I'd gotten before. I did not cast another pearl into this particular pigpen.


Anonymous said...

Thank you - I needed a good laugh today and Black Books is a work of genius - but even funnier is Green Wing.

tlc said...

My favorite rejection paragraph:

"We did review your proposal, and for some reason we don't feel we can represent it. Some of them come close, and yours may well be one of those, but we do have our reasons for declining."

Talk about one size fits none!

Anonymous said...

LOL I...I....I can not speak, the genuis of the work! One weekend to kick out the masterpiece of a lifetime....LOL
Piss midget...I swear I can't breath...LOLOLOLOL
Oh, I am so sending this to the next person that regects my writing. It will make me feel so much better.
Thank you for the laugh.

DJT said...

Re-watching this later today, I think I might have misheard the ending. Did he say:

"Congratulations. Here, have this basket of stuff, and come and stay for the weekend."


"... have this bastard stuffed, and come and stay..."


Anonymous said...


Anne said...

I believe it was "basket of stuff" but "bastard" works just as well.

Thank you so much for posting this, Miss Snark. It's a great reminder of how to respond to rejections (only in your head!) and a great laugh as well. You're awesome.

Chumplet said...

My lovely daughter sent the same link to me earlier today, but my lowly laptop, alas, was unable to provide the viewing of said video. She was again kind enough to allow me to view said video on her desktop computer (which once was the property of yours truly) and I was fortunate to share in such an enlightening experience.

He kinda looks like my brother.