Down Princess, bad bad girl

Dear Miss Snark:

I was Ladies Home Journal last night (I swear, I only subscribe for "Can This Marriage Be Saved?") - when I read this interview with Fergie. As in The Duchess. She says, "Did you know I'm going to have my own radio show? Maybe on Sirius. And my own TV show! And I've just signed a deal with St. Martins Press to write a historical novel - the next Gone with the Wind. I sold it without one chapter written! It's all in my head. My heroine is Lady Margaret, with red hair, and it takes place in the south of Ireland in 1759. I am Lady Margaret at the end of the day. It will be Pride and Prejudice meets 24!"

Should I just start calling myself Princess April?

Well, if Nicole Ritchie can have a book, why not Her Royal Gelatin too. Actually I'm quite in favor of this cause yanno (tm/pp) someone will need to actually WRITE the damn thing and one of my colleagues specializes in ghost writers (not the suspense kind) so who knows, maybe she'll get a deal out of this.

And no, you can't do that Princess April because I've read your books and I like them a lot and if you stop writing them yourself I'm going to square off with you, circle you like a yapping poodle and pummel you write back to your writing desk.


Anonymous said...

It will be Pride and Prejudice meets 24!

Did she really say that?

She better back off the Austen NOW before I go all Lord Nelson at Trafalgar on her ass.

Stacia said...

Jeez, stuff like that is depressing.

Anonymous said...

Hey, give Princess a break. Maybe, she can write. She got a prince, didn't she? Of course, getting an agent is harder. (-:

Georgia Girl

Gabriele Campbell said...

Her Grace should make sure not to miss PBW's Ten Tips for Celebrity Writers.

Have someone read them to you. :)

Sha'el, Princess of Pixies said...

We pixies don't get our due. Being a princess hasn't gotten me a book contract! It's the wings, isn't it? They're jealous of my pretty wings! Or maybe they just don't like goats.

Anonymous said...

Hahahahaha! Nice one, Georgia Girl.

(Wish I'd had a beverage alert for that one.)

Dwight the Troubled Teen
The Fourth Prince of Serendip

Anonymous said...

Didn't she write some kids' books? Something about a helicopter?

Of course, switching from Loopy the Helicopter to romantic suspense would be kinda like Robert Munsch, bless him, trying to pen a legal thriller.

Stacia said...

Budgie the Helicopter, kis!

lizzie26 said...

Oh, geez, she took my idea right out from under me. These super-intelligent celebrities/princesses/whatever, I'm tellin' you....

Anonymous said...

A bit off topic... eh.

One of your collegues specializes in ghost writers? Might you (or s/he) expand on that a bit? I'm currently in college and trying to figure out what I'm going to do in my life... I originally figured I'd edit, but lately I've heard a bit about ghost writing. It sounds interesting... but I'm lost. How does one exactly start ghost writing? I've posted the question to a one or two blogs, but haven't gotten an answer.

Mindy Tarquini said...

People call me Princess all the time. Don't got no agent, though. Got me a corgie, but that don't make me Queen.

I ain't bitter.

Send the goat over with a double-winged gin and tonic on the rocks, Sha'el.

Hold the tonic.

And the rocks.

ryan said...

"Before you go Admiral Nelson at Trafalgar on her ass'? You mean before you get shot to death by French snipers and shippped home in a brandy barrel?

Anonymous said...

Could be worse. It could be Fergie a la Black Eyed Peas cowriting a historical romance.