Dear Bella, t'is no mystery
Why you'll go down in history
As the Writer With The Iron Fist
Okay, anatomy's off - you get the gist.
Your elbow's now a lethal force
We can't compete on foot or horse
(I'm talking about the Sales, of course).
For you're as brave as a hero from Lord of The Rings
But you're going to need one of those cape-y things.
My son made me put that in
He said it would make you grin.
We wanted an epic of pain and pity
All I could manage was this ditty.