9.10.2006

Just a reminder

Don't query Miss Snark.
Not for the crapometer. It's over
Not for your novel.
Not for anything that you want to sell including your kidney.

Nothing.
Nada.
Zilch.

If you just can't imagine why this is the case, consult the FAQ for this blog. There's a link on the blog roll.

In case you think this is just for everyone else and not for you; take heed.

If you query me with your novel, I mark your email address as junk mail.
I'll never hear from you again with that address.

Any questions?



44 comments:

Bloggin' Grammy said...

"Oh my, just don't understand why you have to keep repeating yourself. That message is loud and clear all over this blogspot.

Snarky woman, I can't join you in a bucket of gin but I will pour a nice big girl glass of vino and shake my head a few times for ya!"

LJCohen said...

I own the deed to this really nice bridge that links Manhattan Island with Brooklyn.

Can I interest you in it?

Or a book about selling it?

LOL.

Anonymous said...

I've tried printing this photo three times now. The eyes and nose turn out a disturbingly creepy green and yellow. Is this a warning?

CLH said...

What if you're interested in selling the rights to George Clooney's soul?

Damn. And I thought you'd be interested. Off to the flea market!

XD

Anonymous said...

Please forward those kidney queries my way. You never know when you need to pick someone up on their offer. :)

Barbjn said...

"Any questions?"

Just two: is that REALLY Killer Yapp, and is that his own hair? Say it's so.

Bitty the French Bull,
courtesy of Barbjn

overdog said...

I set the doggy's pic as my desktop background and now he looks too scary.

Anonymous said...

I think they're querying you because they really really badly want to see Angry Dog again.

I know it makes my day every time.

S William said...

So what exactly are you trying to say?

Sherry Decker said...

You will not receive a novel query from me on this blog. Promise.
Now, sit down, put your feet up, gulp some gin with a couple olives and pat yourself on the back. Ya done good.

Anonymous said...

Of course. Because all I ever wanted to do was send my magnum opus, my life's work if you will, to you. Really. Cross my heart.

SAND STORM said...

is his a real pic of the mighty Yapp?

judy said...

Not even for a kidney? Boy, that's rough.

Anonymous said...

Just one question. Is that Killer Yapp?

Cudd said...

So... when are you posting a new picture of Killer Yap to threaten us with? I think we need fresh inspiration for staying in line, ;)

Sue said...

Is anyone else having this problem? Miss Snark, ever since you started the crapometer, the right side of your blog has gone missing, the side containing all that information and the links (and archive list.) I see it on the site of other bloggers but nowhere on yours.

Err, there is some sort of timeout error at the bottom of this behemoth (tried twice) down around entry 66.

Chumplet said...

Oooo. I hope the newbies got the message.

Miss Snark said...

Sue, refresh your browser when you get that screen. Blogger is weird. I get it too if I navigate on the page before it fully loads.

Miss Snark said...

There are four bridges from Manhattan to Brooklyn.

1. Brooklyn
2. Manhattan
3. Williamsburg
4...uh...ok, three. that other one is in Queens.

Which one's yours?

New but not Stupid said...

That's one angry poodle...one wonders what pissed him off...

Yasamin said...

whats that saying?

"Popularity's a bitch." ~ me.

lol feeling a little bogged down? its like paparazzi except instead of cameras, it's manuscripts. lol I hope it calms down a bit for you.

Lexie Ward said...

Aw darn. I had a 550,000 word historical science fiction novel with paranormal overtones I was going to query you about. It's the first and shortest in a series of three.

Just kidding. Have a good night, you've earned it!

Lexie Ward said...

BTW, (you don't have to post this one, just for your info), I'm having the same problem as Sue and the refresh button doesn't help. But maybe it is a short term thing and will resolve itself tomorrow. Tonight is the first time I've had the problem.

Dana Y. T. Lin said...

Killer Yapp is sooooooo cute. Not cuddle up in a hammock while you take a nap cute, but killer cute. I'm printing him out and tacking him next to my computer for when I write horror.

puppy love said...

That pic is effing cute, I can't even take it.

Janet Black said...

How often does KY have a spa day?

snarkfodder said...

Yes, one question.

What compelled you to put your dog in a drier?

Alan said...

No queries, under any circumstances. Hmm. Come on, spill the beans. How many crazy bulls responded to that red rag with a query?

Snowfie said...

Color me informed. And to think I was about to make the major mistake of sending a query on a book I haven't written about abolutely nothing at all useful.

P.S. Miss Snark I must say you're a real character. Maybe someone will write a book about you? ;)

Anonymous said...

Sue,

the links, archive list and all the other stuff are right down at the bottom of the page, just scroll down.

dink said...

I love that seeing that dog face so much that I'm secretly chanting:

Go Nitwits~Go Nitwits~Go Nitwits...

Desperate Writer said...

Okay. But someday, somehow, I WILL manage to be Crapometered. ;)

Cudd said...

Oh bugger, I left out the second 'p' in Killer Yapp. Now I feel like a nitwit.

Fledgling Snarkling said...

I hope that's not Killer Yap!

The dog in the picture is a Bichon Frise - NOT a Poodle. Not even a badly groomed Poodle!

The Bichon and Poodle are in the same AKC group (Non-Sporting), but are not related at all.

Ryan Field said...

Actually, it's a relief to read posts and comments about the business without having to deal with the notion of whether or not Miss Snark would want to represent us. For free, too! When I was graduated from college in the late eighties you couldn't get this kind of advice anywhere.

We should be kissing her pretty
http:// for this.

McSwilligans said...

So what's your e-mail address please?

I'd like to send you a query if that's OK. TRUST ME, this book will make us both rich!

Stuart said...

But I have a nice Kidney...

:)

Anonymous said...

My two-year-old daughter just looked over my shoulder at the photo and said, "Oh look, Mummy, it's a friendly little doggy."

M.E Ellis said...

LMFAO @ that poodle's face!

Bless!

:o)

Anonymous said...

Just a suggestion: Maybe you should have a caption at the top of the blog that says, "READ THE DAMN FAQ BEFORE YOU SEND ME ANYTHING." Because honestly, as a newbie I didn't know you don't accept queries through the site and I don't think it's as obvious as the Snarklings seem to think it is (FYI, I didn't submit a query but have some sympathy for those who did).

ColoradoGuy said...

"The Bichon and Poodle are in the same AKC group (Non-Sporting), but are not related at all."

Yeah, but neither one sheds much, which is great for us sneezers and wheezers. Our big standard poodle sheds less hair than I do.

Sarabande said...

I think that's the whole deal in a nutshell, Anonymous: "As a newbie, I didn't know..."

You DO NOT query an agent you know nothing about! Surfing the web and latching on to whatever Google sends you with the term "agent" attached to it, and contacting each and every one simply because there's an email address on the page, is a poor way to go about getting an agent.

Even newbies should know what they are doing, and if that takes time and a little bit of reading, well... so be it. Them's the breaks, as my Dad says.

I think Miss Snark is BRILLIANT for her solution of blocking those people from her email. And it's funny as hell that she's telling us about it.

It's yet another way that newbies can find out about what this blog is about, and especially what Miss Snark is about. Anyone who spends 45 seconds reading the blog should be expected to figure this out, and if they can't they shouldn't be querying her. Period.

Anonymous said...

No relation to WSA, then?

-kd

Sarabande said...

The flip side of that Killer Yapp photo (from prweb.com):

http://ww1.prweb.com/prfiles/2006/09/06/433956/CrittersnapsFolly1.jpg