It's the Fourth of July in Cleveland, and private investigator Rick Campbell starts his vacation by hooking up with Valeria, a sexy Russian woman. In Lady Double Dealer, it's just a happy one-night stand before Campbell leaves town for a couple week. To Valeria, it's her chance to find her boss and his missing limousine. When Rick tries to say no, he finds an old friend has been drawn into the crossfire. Soon Rick is playing a deadly shell game with a limo and a car thief, trying to stay one-step ahead of the Russian Mafiya and the police. Complicating matters is the dead body in the trunk, which Rick conceals in an unusual way. With the humor of Elmore Leonard and the edginess of Dennis Lehane, Lady Double Dealer careens through the North Coast on its way to a fiery climax in Cleveland's industrial Flats.
I'm bored to tears by the Russian mafia right now. How about the Baptist mafia?
Elmore Leonard is funny as hell because he turns your expectations upside down. (brief pause for homage to Out of Sight based on a Leonared novel and starring The Sexiest Man Alive). You're not doing that here, or if you are, you haven't shown it in this hook.
You've got the form right; you just need to actually describe a book that doesn't sound like every other PI book east of Cleveland.