The sex wasn’t great, she thought as she rolled over in bed and stared into the darkness. The sex was barely good most of the time. Who said it was supposed to be? What is sex anyway, less than one percent of a relationship? There are other much more vital parts to a healthy relationship. There are common interests, common goals.
Suzanne looked over at the heap of flesh laying next to her then back up into the darkness. " He was good looking. He was intelligent and motivated. His motivation took him directly to the top. Suzanne admired that most. They had interesting dinner conversations.
What am I doing here, she thought. Was she dating this man for interesting dinner conversation? She rolled over toward the edge of the bed. Her internal war raged on as she looked around the room. It was dark, though out side she was sure the moon was just shining through the new night.
How could she sleep? How could he sleep? This wasn’t her room. The fancy furniture, the stunning woodwork and overpriced window dressings covering the beautiful windows weren’t what she wanted. She wanted to see at least a glimpse of the moon and stars shining through the room.
The next five days, Suzanne decides to return home, her sister is in a serious accident and her best friend is kidnapped, and somehow it all connects to one man and the dreams they once shared.
I'm not sure what this is. I thought it was a first page until the final paragraph. There are good examples of hooks posted. Go check them out.
And "She felt the disgust churn in her stomach" is the kind of thing that makes me reject stuff without reading further. It's overdone "Disgust churned in her stomach" conveys the same thing more fluently.