Is there phone service in the afterlife?

Miss Snark--Help! my agent is an industry veteran. he won't tell me whether my novel has been submitted to publishers yet. He ignores my emails asking the information. What should I do?

Check Vital Records. Maybe he's dead.

Make friends with the assistant.

No assistant?
Make friends with someone else in the office.

Solo practitioner?
Time to get on the horn and give this guy a call.

You don't mention how long this has been going on.
Anything less than a month and the real answer is sit on your hands.

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